Adjusting To Culture Pt. 1

Kelci and I have now been here in Brazil for a little more than 3 months and we have already adjusted to some of the cultural differences here. We know there will be many more adjustments to come as well. There is no way around culture differences, however, Kelci and I have tried approaching every difference as simply just that...different. They are not bad and there is nothing wrong with the way that we do things or the way that people from other cultures do things. Different is simply different. In three installments, I am going to discuss some cultural differences that Kelci and I have adjusted to, are adjusting to, or are having difficulties adjusting to.

This picture has nothing to do with this story...
But oh well...

This past Friday was a friend of mine's birthday. His brothers had told me a few days prior to it that they were planning to do something for his birthday and that they would let me know what the plan was, where it was going to be and when it would be. All week, I was waiting for them to text or call me with the plan. However, I got nothing. Friday rolled around and I had assumed that either nothing was happening or that I was not going to be a part of it. I had texted them and tried calling them to see what was going on, however, didn't get a response. So Friday night at 8:30, Kelci and I were about to have dinner as we assumed nothing was going on until the phone rang. They had just made a plan and were heading to dinner at a restaurant nearby. I am not ready to say that in the states a plan would have been made days in advance, because certainly there were many instances where that was not the case. However, usually when it came to birthday parties...plans were passed along a little earlier than minutes before. That is just a cultural thing here in Rio though. Time is not as pressing. Schedules are not set in stone and are always very flexible.

That was not the only cultural difference we came across that night. When we arrived, there were probably 8 people already there and we figured that the was the whole group. However, going along with the difference in schedules and plan-making here...people show up to parties and events kind of...whenever. I think it is just assumed that most people will be a late.

Likewise, Kelci and I are used to ordering our own meals at restaurants pretty much every time. I would say that is pretty normal in the states. However, for dinner that evening a plate of chicken tenders and two plates of cheese fries were ordered for everyone (10ish people) while we were there. Smaller dinners and bigger lunches are common here so we found that to be pretty typical. However, Kelci and I are still getting used to that. Lastly, we are used to going out to dinner and then going to a movie afterwards or going back to someones house to watch a movie or play a game or something. However, the expectation at dinner this night was to just stay at the restaurant and be together and talk and hang out. We loved it! However, there were some added difficulties because of the whole language thing (helped by the fact that a couple of the people spoke very good English).

Culture can be tricky thing and as you can see there were some differences that we encountered this evening. Like I said, none of them are bad but we are still adjusting to some of them. We actually like many of the cultural differences here and will continue to encounter many more over the coming months and years. We look forward to every adjustment, because that only brings us closer to our friends and our community here.

-Kelly and Kelci

Cook John Kelly

About a month ago or so, I posted on Facebook about a experience that Kelci and I had going to the supermarket here in Niteroi. It was quite an experience. It was our first time going shopping for everything that we needed and we needed a lot. You rarely need to buy things like Vanilla, Seasonings, Baking Powder and the like...however...when you move somewhere and don't have those things. You do! It isn't such a big deal when you can read the language or communicate with people in the same language. However, when you can't do those things very well..it can be a bit frustrating.

Kelci and I have gotten a lot better at shopping and we go to the store here probably 2 times a week (at least) and now know where things are and feel a little more confident in asking people for help. Everyone is always willing to help. But going shopping is always an experience at this time in our life.

In the states, I rarely cooked. Kelci cooked and makes very good food, however, she would admit that it is not something she necessarily likes to do. My idea of cooking was usually fast food, frozen pizzas, pasta, or tacos. I am also pretty good at making eggs. I am opposite of Kelci I think. I actually kind of like to cook, but don't do it that often because I am not very good at it, not very creative with it, and don't have a lot of food ideas. That is all changing here. We don't have as many fast food restaurants or frozen foods and we don't have taco seasoning (though Kelci's friends did send us some and that was awesome!). Therefore, I am having to learn to cook more and I am enjoying it. I'm not very creative yet and still search for ideas and recipes online. I'm also pretty sure the things I have made have not turned out nearly like they were supposed to. But I haven't ruined anything yet and you gotta start somewhere. I plan on making pancakes soon without the "Just Add Water" Box. I am going to make a Spaghetti Chicken Casserole soon (which I guess is really popular in CofC potlucks though I don't remember having it). I am by no means a chef. But it is somewhat fun learning to cook. Now all I need is a dishwasher because I don't love to clean up what I cook yet...much to the chagrin of my wife. Maybe that'll come with time!

-Kelly (If you got an easy recipe that you feel I need to try, let me know. Note though...there are many things that you can easily find in the states that are not here.)

The Sport Of The World

Sports have always been a part of my life. Ever since I was a kid, I have loved sports. I have often wondered why sports has always been such a large part of my life as my family likes sports, but not to the degree that I do (though my Uncle and I have always bonded over sports). When I was a kid, I even bought a small 10inch black and white television at the Flee Market to put in my room so that I could watch Rockies and Nuggets games on basic channels. That was when professional sports were often on non-cable TV. I can remember sneaking a radio into my bed to listen to radio broadcasts of games and falling asleep with those sounds in my ears. I played sports throughout my childhood and my summer days were filled with basketball games, hockey games, home-run derbys and every other sport or sport-like game in between.  Needless to say, I was and still am a little obsessed.

Like many other children in the US, the first team sport I played on and was a part of was soccer. I loved it and I wish I never would have stopped! However, for many children in the US soccer becomes a secondary sport and football or baseball or softball or volleyball or basketball takes over. But I always liked watching and playing soccer. Kelci and I even played indoor soccer together for a few years before moving here. BUT...you will never understand the game of soccer until you

live in a foreign country. Especially a foreign country that likes its soccer as much as Brazil!

Brazil loves its soccer and it's such a cool experience to be a part of. You always know when soccer is on because noise reigns throughout the city when a game starts and favorite teams score. One of my favorite questions to ask people right now is "What soccer team do you like?" and it almost always a conversation starter because soccer is not just a sport here...it is a part of life. It is a part of the culture. It helps define Brazil. Football and basketball may have the US, but soccer has the world and it is clearly evident when you live abroad. Everywhere you go and almost everybody you talk to knows soccer. I obviously knew before we came that soccer was THE sport here, but I don't think I ever could have been prepared for just how influential, important, and emotional soccer is here. It is a unifying force and we are glad to be a part of it.

-Kelly

New Friends...New Relationships

Kelci and I are blessed with some very special friends. Many of my friends I have known since before college and most of the rest I met in college when friendships become life-long relationships. Kelci, likewise, has been blessed with some friends that are more like sisters. It is important to us to have good friends of which we can share life with. Our friends in the States will always be a part of who we are, we still talk to them and love 'em. 

Before leaving we often discussed how much our friends meant to us and how important it would be for us to make new friends here. It was definitely something we prayed about. We wanted to make friends with people at the church here. We wanted to make friends with people from the community. And we knew that we needed friendships to help us adapt. Obviously, there are some new aspects to our friendships here. The obvious one is language, however luckily for us, all our friends are patient with us and some speak a little english too. Culture and life experiences are a couple other new aspects for us, however, we truly have not had too much difficulty and we know that God has been preparing the way for us before we arrived. 

I used to tell the youth group at Edmond that life was all about relationships. I used to say that the Bible is all about relationships too: the relationship God desires to have with us and the relationships we have with each other. We have made some very good friends already here in Brazil and we are excited to see who God brings into our path next. Our prayers have been answered thus far as our new friends here have helped us to adapt, we are blessed to have them. We have also grown our friendships with the team here which has been a blessing too. Our prayer is that we continue to make friends here and that those relationships bring us closer to God and that we can bring others closer to Him as well. That truly is what life is all about. The past few months have been awesome and Kelci and I attribute a big part of that to our new friends here in Niteroi! The coming years ought to be fun!

- Kelly and Kelci

Been Too Long...

A Taxi-Ride selfie after receiving the keys to our apartment!

Recently one of our good friends in the states messaged us and mentioned how we need to be blogging more. She had been a missionary before as well so she knew a few things about blogging while being a missionary. She knows how you all back in the states want to know what is going on with us. She knows also how things can become busy and blogging can go to the "back burner" of life. Most importantly maybe, she knows what it is like to look back at every blog article after leaving the mission field and remembering special moments, recollecting feelings that she had during stressful and joyful times, and the cultural adaptation she went through. So...after we messaged back and forth for a bit I have re-committed to blogging more. I really do like to to it. I think it is fun and I think it is a good way to keep you all informed. However, it is also very much for us. There have been many times in the past few weeks that I have though about something and thought that it would be good to blog about, but did not because I was not sure anyone would care. But I want to be able to look back on these moments after we leave and be reminded about them. Therefore, to catch up on things I am going to try and blog every day this week. I want to catch you all up on our past month or so. We appreciate you all so much and your prayers and support. It is only fair of us to catch you up some. 

They had to take our door off to get our
refrigerator through the door. 

I am sure you saw pictures or heard from someone, but we did find our apartment and have now lived here for a little more than a month. It was quite a process to get to this point. We love our new place and will love it even more when it is complete and furnished. We have purchased mostly all of our furniture but have only received our bed, TV stand, TV, a dresser we bought used, another bed we bought from some friends for our other bedroom, our stove and refrigerator. We stole (borrowed with approval) 2 chairs from the church here to have something to sit on. They are good chairs for church but not the greatest chairs for life. We have told numerous people here how we will have them over to our apartment for dinner or a movie or something once our apartment is closer to being ready. However, it could be a bit longer as almost everything we have bought has been coupled with the statement "35 dias úteis" which means 35 business days. We believe we will receive our couch this month which we look forward to very much. However, we feel very blessed to have an apartment and we know it will be a great place to connect with people, serve our friends, and develop deep relationships that we pray become Kingdom relationships! We look forward to those days! Thanks for everything you all do for us!

- Kelly and Kelci